


I Won't Let Them Break Me Down To Dust

by marvel_middleearth



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-05
Updated: 2019-02-05
Packaged: 2019-10-22 18:18:10
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,626
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17667674
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/marvel_middleearth/pseuds/marvel_middleearth
Summary: When Thanos opened the portal and they stepped out into Vormir, Gamora knew this was the end. She wasn't a hero. Thanos was going to win.The events of Infinity War on Vormir, from Gamora's point of view.





	I Won't Let Them Break Me Down To Dust

**Author's Note:**

> Hi again, guys! So here's a fanfic that I've been working on for a while. I was inspired to start it after seeing Avengers: Infinity War, which TOTALLY BROKE ME, so I felt I needed to write something about it. The first fic is about the events of Vormir but from Gamora's point of view. I've got a few other IW pieces (including THAT Peter and Tony scene if you know what I mean....) but I thought I'd share this one first and if people seem to like it I'll upload the others.
> 
> So please...try to enjoy it, if that's possible! I'm so sorry.........
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel or any of the characters. Some of the dialogue in this fic is straight from the movie and I do not own it, I merely looked at the scene from a different POV. I do not claim the characters nor dialogue as my own. Also, my inspiration for the title of this work comes from "This is Me" by Keala Settle from the Greatest Showman.

When Thanos opened the portal and they stepped out into Vormir, Gamora knew this was the end. She wasn't a hero. Thanos was going to win.

She cast a sideways glance at her adoptive father. His gaze was stern and determined; the Infinity Gauntlet glinted on his left hand, catching the light of the fading sun. Inside, her heart was beating fast with fear. She should never have brought him here. He was a murderer, and by bringing him to Vormir, she was helping him. That made her just as bad as he was.

But there had been no other choice, she reflected agonisingly. He'd threatened to kill Nebula and she couldn't have let that happen, not in front of her own eyes, not when she could save her. Gamora wished fiercely now that she'd never told Nebula about the map. If she'd just kept it to herself, maybe Thanos wouldn't have tortured her sister. Maybe Gamora would still be with the other Guardians; with Peter, with Drax, with Rocket, Groot and Mantis.  
  
Or maybe she would be dead. Maybe Thanos wouldn't have stopped Peter from shooting her in Knowhere.

  
_It doesn't matter now,_ Gamora thought fiercely. She'd brought Thanos here and there was no turning back. As she stepped out towards the cliffs, her boots sinking into the soft sand, she kept her expression blank. She wasn't going to let Thanos see her anger, or her fear.

"The stone had better be up there," Thanos said quietly, from behind her. "For your sister's sake."  
  
His words sent a shiver down Gamora's spine.  
  
They followed a winding stone trail up the cliffs. Gamora didn't dare glance over the side when they reached the top; it was a chilling drop down to the bottom. They approached a narrow trail where two rock walls towered on either side, and Gamora's heart thumped as something coalesced from the darkness, forming a shadowy figure.  
  
"Welcome, Thanos, son of Alars," the figure hissed eerily. "Gamora, daughter of Thanos."  
  
"You know us?" Thanos asked suspiciously.  
  
"It is my curse to know all who journey here," the figure replied.  
  
"Where is the Soul Stone?" Thanos demanded.  
  
"You should know..." the figure warned. "It extracts a terrible price."  
  
"I am prepared," Thanos growled.  
  
"We all think that at first." The figure glided towards them, revealing a human with a disfigured, red face and tattered black robes that whipped around him in the wind. "We are all wrong," he hissed.

The Stonekeeper led them through the rocks to a cliff that jutted out over the rest of Vormir. Tiny flecks of snow blew around them, settling in Gamora's hair like tiny crystals. The sky was dark and the rocks were covered in a thin layer of frost. The wind howled like a savage animal over the cliffs, swirling the magenta tips of Gamora's hair in the darkness.  
  
"How is it you know this place so well?" Thanos asked with cold curiousity, watching the Stonekeeper glide over the stones.  
  
"A lifetime ago, I, too, sought the stones," the Stonekeeper explained in a hiss. "I even held one in my hand. But it cast me out, banished me here. Guiding others to a treasure I cannot possess."  
  
He glided to the edge of the cliff. "What you seek lies before you," he hissed. "As does what you fear."  
  
"What is this?" Thanos demanded angrily, stepping forward with a thunderous expression on his face. Gamora could see his thoughts in his expression: _Where is the stone?!_  
  
"The price. Soul holds a special place among the Infinity Stones. You might say it has a certain _wisdom_."  
  
"Tell me what it needs," Thanos commanded, his voice calm once again, moving towards the Stonekeeper.

"To ensure that whoever possesses it understands its power...the stone demands a sacrifice." The Stonekeeper's eyes glinted.  
  
"Of what?" Thanos asked, his eyes narrowed.  
  
"In order to take the stone you must lose that which you love," the Stonekeeper said solemnly. "A soul...for a soul."  
  
Gamora's eyes widened in surprise. She felt unbelievable, overwhelming triumph, and against the odds, she began to laugh. A mocking, satisfied smile burst across her face and she laughed even more. The stone was untouchable! Maybe Thanos wasn't going to win after all.  
  
"All my life, I dreamed of a day," Gamora spat. She tilted her head towards him, smiling. "A moment when you would get what you  _deserved_. And I was _always_ so disappointed. But now...You kill and torture, and you call it  _mercy_. The universe has _judged_ you. You asked it for a prize, and it told you _no_. You _failed_. And do you want to know why? Because you love _nothing_. No one!"

The wind howled over the rocks. Gamora waited for her father's reply; it took a long time in coming, and when it came, it wasn't what she was expecting.  
  
"No," Thanos said quietly. He turned slowly to face her.  
  
She expected to see disappointment and anger in his face; instead, she felt shock flash through her as she gazed upon his broken expression. A single tear glistened on his cheek.  
  
"Really?" Gamora asked scornfully. "Tears?"  
  
"They're not for him," the Stonekeeper said softly.  
  
Gamora's face paled with realisation, the smile falling from her face. Her mind filled with memories: Thanos helping her to balance the silver knife on her finger, Thanos wiping away her tears with a gentle finger, Thanos watching with pride as she beat Nebula over and over again. Thanos wasn't crying for himself. Thanos was crying for her.  
  
To win, Thanos was willing to sacrifice her.  
  
"No," Gamora whispered. "No. No, this isn't love!" She backed away, her hand flying to her belt. She turned away from him, drawing the silver knife from her scabbard. The jewels glittered in the frozen light as she raised it to her chest.

Thanos would never use her to get the Soul Stone, even if she had to end her life here and now, with the very same blade she had been given by him as a child, so long ago.  
  
Without pausing to think, Gamora stabbed the knife into her chest with an agonised cry. But she felt no pain. She glanced down, and watched in horror as the knife turned to shimmering bubbles that floated away into the cold Vormir air. She could see her reflection in them before they dissolved into the wind. _Bubbles_ , Gamora thought viciously. _I always hated those bubbles._  
  
"I ignored my destiny once," Thanos said softly. "I cannot do that again, even for you. I'm sorry, little one."  
  
He grabbed her arm. Gamora screamed and writhed away, trying to get free. Everything was painfully loud: her screams echoing in her ears, her boots scraping on the frozen rocks. She twisted away from Thanos, but his grip on her arm was too strong. He dragged her backwards across the rocks, towards the precipice.  
  
Do you know those moments where you can't believe this is really your life? Whether you're not sure if this is real, or if it's all a dream your mind's made up to scare you? When life seems so crazy you're not sure whether to believe in it? When you feel like surely, any second now, you'll wake up to reality?  
  
Gamora had never wished for it to all be a dream more than she did now.  
  
"No! No! _No!_ " she screamed, tears sliding down her face.

Thanos ignored her.  
  
His hand let go of her arm.  
  
Her feet left the ground.  
  
There was nothing around her but air.  
  
Gamora fell.  
  
She could hear her screams above the wind howling in her ears. The wind was whipping at her clothes, tossing her hair around her face, blowing snow around her falling body. There was nothing beneath her, nothing around her, nothing to grab to slow her fall. _There's nobody here to save you this time_ , a voice whispered in her mind. _You're going to die._  
  
Gamora screamed again, her voice going hoarse. Time seemed to be going slower, but she was still falling just as fast. She wished she could be suspended in air forever. She didn't want to return to the top, to that monster she'd once called her father; she didn't want to reach the bottom, and face the cold eternity there.

There was nothing she could do. In the midst of her terror, an image of Peter slipped into her mind and she almost smiled. Oh, how she missed him. Oh, how she wished he was here now to catch her. But she knew there was nothing at the bottom of this cliff except death.  
  
The ground was almost beneath her and Gamora closed her eyes. Her last thought was one filled with regret; it was a memory, so long ago it almost seemed a dream.  
  
_"Quill, I have lived most of my life surrounded my enemies. I will be_ _grateful to die among my friends."_  
  
And yet here she was, about to die. Not surrounded by her enemies, but not surrounded by her friends, either. Completely alone. Gamora's eyes opened, and she stared up into the snow swirling around her. She could still see her father at the top of the cliff, a tiny shape staring down after her.  
  
She hit the ground and there was a moment of splitting, blinding, unbelievable pain, like her whole body was breaking apart. A soft cry slipped from her mouth. Her eyes closed again, sealing a memory of the Guardians against her eyelids: Peter, Drax, Rocket, Groot, Mantis. 'Rubberband Man' played faintly in her mind. Her eyes filled with tears at the memory of it, at the realisation of everything she was about to lose.  
  
Then, for the very last time, everything went dark.

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave comments or kudos if you have time! If you don't, thank you for reading!!!!!!! Please let me know if you're interested and want me to upload my other Infinity War fanfics.


End file.
